To lovely to be silent right now

Blind to the sounds around you, deaf to the colours of this symphony. Not seeing that you are all this, part of this and a single unit at the same time.

Flying high at times like an eagle, a piercing cry on your beak breaks the skies, dances at the top of this symphony, then falling down again, being the murmur of the waters in the ground, the bass in this symphony, the grumbling and rocking earth, slow, patient, ultra low in frequency.

Whatever your voice in this symphony is, it happens in time, and yet, it is so marvellous an experience that you come here again and again, feeling, hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling this symphony again and again.

Oh, this time I will play this tenor, being a hero, fanfare to the attack, and I will die a glorious death, rising like a star and falling like a meteorite.

At other times you prefer to play the bass, giving the drum beat to the other players, your beat like the applause which cheers them on.

Oh how marvellous to feel oneself as part of this symphony.

What a glorious all-encompassing experience this is.

There are people who want to escape this.
Makes me wonder why?

You must have lived trillions of lives to get bored of this. Or lived countless of lives being totally separated from your own reality.
But once you get a glimpse of who you are again, once the awakening happens, there is no stopping. You begin to dance and praise this creation again, in whatever way that suits you.

I don’t understand this bone dry souls, having separated themselves completely from this symphony, thinking they are in fact the god, the creator of all this. They are mistaken. Their reign can only exist in copying what already exists, in taking apart and putting together again. They deem their creations, beings, machines superior, and yet, compared to the original creators force, they are clumsy and ugly only.

You are a creator by nature as you are an expression of this creative force that permeates the universe.
You are an individual and yet at the same time embedded in that field.
Nothing to fear, as even death looses its grip knowing this.
Your joy is travelling far, and wherever it goes, it inspires.

You know, that all this is routed in silence.
Yet the music to lovely to be silent right now.

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Even here

Even here

Remembering my own birth, I know how it felt to fall to earth.
It feels like falling from a clear, soft lightness, to heavy molasses.
It felt sticky, labour-some, and most of all, suffocating.
What was instantaneous in the world I came from, takes ages to develop here.
One thought there, takes years to develop here,
and usually only few people have the discipline to stick to an idea until it manifests.

Impatience was my companion.

But even there, in that time of impatience in that slow, cumbersome world,
there was this beauty present everywhere.
I found it in nature most easily.
Humans seemed strange to me all the time, covered in mud of prejudices, concepts and dogmas, even me.

While digging deep into meditation in the Ashram, the Presence was all-pervading.
But a person was there all the time, the sense of I.
My practice started in a childlike manner, and I dived deep passed all obstacles immediately.
Nothing was easier then letting go.

While learning for school, while studying, growing up, from where I came, my family…
Even here, this continuous thread, that combines all these stages, that sense of awareness, of Presence.

In the warm embrace of a hug, in the sweet kisses of my loved one, in her laugher and her tears,
even here, no one there to take it personally, only one that pervades everything.

A long way have I gone, and in this going, there lies its secret, nothing to take personal here.
In loneliness or in pain, even there, nothing to avoid.

Nothing has ever been taken away from me, nothing ever added.
I am that which one calls the one that is more then the sum of its parts.
Aware of that organism, Brahman as some may call it, nothing is mysterious anymore.

There is no separate identity called I.
It is an image on a screen, the snake in the night that turns out to be a rope in the sunlight, a castle in the air.

Nothing has ever been taken away from me, nothing ever been given.
Adding wholeness to wholeness results in wholeness.
Adding infinity to infinity, infinity remains.

Indulging in this awareness, what appears as this person called me, is a play on a screen.
The screen is real, the play on is not.
We identified with an image like a lover, and became lost in it.
The result is the experience of separation and pain.

And yet, even here, lies great beauty.
Nothing to avoid,
neither joy nor tears.

Even here,
nobody is present.

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Leadenly Times, or, Why Arjuna had to fight

Once I was so much engulfed in seriousness that it felt so heavy, that it was almost impossible to bear. Everything was full of meaning, heavy of bearing like lead. It was hard to breath, hard to sleep, only the silence in meditation was an escape.

The thought of me having to fight, although knowing that all fight is fruitless, was impossible to bear and to face for me. I knew it, since I started realizing my silent inner nature, and reading the Bhagavadgita, that the time will come when I will have to fight.
And like Arjuna, the thought of this, terrified me. All the time in this years, it haunted me like a ghost. This scene has engraved itself deeply into me.
Times were grimmer just 30 years ago. The world didn’t look like it would be changing for the better at all. It looked like I would have to live and fight  for light and freedom, knowing that I will ultimately fail, letting ignorance fall upon earth and succumbing myself to it as well.
The only honor was in dying for a just cause.

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Comparison of Devanagari fonts on OS X using the 807 documented ligatures of classical Sanskrit, according to the research of Ulrich Stiehl

This short article is from my new blog
The actual work is to be found in the PDF that you can download at the end of the article. It took quite a lot of time to create this chart. As a result I can see that finally the Macintosh has grown up and is supporting Sanskrit without major hassle.

Sanskrit on the Mac
Before OS X 10.10 Yosemite there have been only two fonts in OS X with support for Devanagari characters, this have been Devanagari Sangam MN and Devanagari MT.
Since Yosemite the fonts Kohinoor, ITF and Shree have been added. All 3 come in several styles, making it thereby possible for the first time to write Sanskrit in Italic and other styles right out of the box, without buying additional fonts.

To use Windows OpenType fonts like Sanskrit 2003, Chandas, Uttara and others on the Mac, you have to use at least OS X 10.7 Lion which introduced support for the necessary OpenType features.

The following table is a comparison of several fonts that can be used on the Mac and that are freely available. Despite this free availability, please observe the copyright and license under wich these fonts are distributed.
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Advaita Today ◦ Western Masters of Nonduality

Francis Lucille, Rupert Spira, Greg Goode, Jeff Foster

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Michael Tsarion – The Posthuman World


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All dies kümmert mich nicht mehr

I dachte, wenn ich erst einmal alle Antworten auf die großen Fragen habe, die Frage nach dem warum ich hier bin und worum es im Leben geht, habe ich alles erreicht, was es zu erreichen gibt. Ich dachte, wenn ich ‚erleuchtet‘ bin, gibt es nichts mehr zu tun. Ich dachte, wenn der Fragende loslässt und sich öffnet, gibt es nichts mehr zu tun.

Ich irrte.

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When the mind falls into the heart

„…When the mind falls into the heart,
everyone lands back on the original tree
where they began, though no one
has really gone anywhere.

frei übersetzt:

„…Wenn der Kopf ins Herz sinkt,
findet sich jeder auf dem Urbaum wieder,
wo alles began, obwohl niemand
jemals irgendwohin gegangen ist.

Bob O’Hearn, Sky of Mind

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The Miracle of Experience


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The Nature of Perception – Rupert Spira

“The collapse of the inside self and the outside world”


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Why am I Not Enlightened Yet?

How wonderfully and clearly explained .


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Fall Into the Arms You Can’t See


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Vielleicht Logisch – Robert Anton Wilson – Maybe Logic – Deutsch

With deep gratitude to Robert Anton Wilson († 11. Januar 2007), who helped me to become more conscious of my invisible inner walls.



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Not of my concern anymore

I thought, once you know the answers to the main questions, the answers to why you are here and what life is all about, you achieved all there is to achieve.
I thought, once you are ‘enlightened’, there is nothing more to do.
I thought, once the one who asks the questions lets go and opens up, there is nothing more to do.

I was wrong.

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Robert Monroe’s Out of Body Experiences


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Background Studies 3

Background Studies 3

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Background Studies 2

Background Studies 2

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Background Studies 1

Background Study

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Erkenne dich selbst (“Know Thyself”)

Mit deutschen Untertiteln von mir.

With german subtitles by me.

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Without Hope

I survived intact with heart and mind,
all those years of lies and self deception.
I feel I have arrived.

I feel it’s done.
I got to a place where I finally are at peace with myself and the world.
I feel I am ready to leave and go.

Realizing my own nature.
Realizing being connected to this planet.
After a period of rest,
I discovered,
that now is
the time to act,
and not to die.

I find myself doing, without doubting,
doing without identifying,
doing with heart and mind.
Effortlessly, yet passionately.
Relieved from the effort of thinking what impression I make onto others,
what seemed difficult before,
is lifted easily now.

Now I can act sincerely,
without an idea about myself.
And, most important,
without hope.

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